Date Your Damn Self!

Just because there’s no plus one, doesn’t mean you can’t have fun! Ok, ok, that was cheesy. But I am here to attest to it’s truth.

When you are single, you are in a relationship with yourself. In fact, our relationship with ourselves is the longest relationship we will sustain in a lifetime, so we should damn well make it a good one. You’ve heard that how we talk to ourselves, our inner dialogue, sets the precedent for our confidence, our actions (or lack thereof), as well as how we believe others perceive us. We know we need to drink water, get enough sleep, eat well, exercise, take our vitamins……all of the ingredients to a healthy physical state. But equally as important, is our self care and our not just DEALING with being single, but actually ENJOYING the hell out of it.

One way we can do that, is by setting aside a day or night every week for a solo date! It may take a bit of an adjustment period to be comfortable doing things like dining alone, but once you embrace it, I assure you it will be something you look forward to!

Some of my favorite things to do alone are:

Live music – I love an intimate venue, maybe that’s the 33 year old in me talking, but gone are my days of wanting to be shoved and squished in a crowd of people. Working in the City, there are multiple venues I enjoy regularly that offer food, beverages, and comfortable seating, along with some talented artists. And don’t be afraid to dress up, put on those heels and that bright lipstick that your ex said he didn’t like. Looking good always makes you feel good as well. Below is from a night I took myself to the Black Cat club for a jazz show.

Solo date in SF. Dinner & a show.

Day Hikes – Nothing clears your mind and lifts your spirits like some fresh air, good tunes in your headphones, natural beauty, and some exercise. Below is a picture of one of my favorite day hikes along the ocean in San Francisco. For those natives reading, you know it as Lands End.

Spa Days – Need I say more?? Who doesn’t love to be pampered? And since spa time is traditionally quiet, alone time anyway, what better way to refresh yourself?! Be sure to look up spa packages well ahead of time, as they often book up quickly. I like to plan mine toward the evening, if possible, so I can just enjoy a solo Netflix and chill night after.

Farmer’s Market – When the season is right, definitely hit up your local farmers market. It’s another opportunity to enjoy some sunshine, grab some fresh produce and goodies, support local vendors, and maybe catch some live music.

When it comes to solo dates, there’s an ease that comes along with the lack of obligation to make conversation and engage the person(s) around you. It’s freeing and allows your mind to wander, to get lost in a good book, or simply sight see. Oh and if you want to commemorate your date, don’t be afraid to ask someone to take your picture! You’ll be surprised at how many passerby will oblige (and I always offer to return the favor).

Whatever you do, don’t knock it ’til you try it!

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